1.30 开始想些有的没的。。。自己也不懂自己怎样了,变了吗?还是都一样,压力还在,害怕的感觉也在,每天都一样,想来想去,为未来预测,如果怎样怎样,那我会怎样怎样,如果这样的话,那我有会怎样怎样呢?自己知道想是无补于事,但是我还是在想,是我太得空了吧。。。这个学期的我,除了上Lecture还有Tutorial,基本上也没去参加任何活动或出席任何团体主办的活动,感觉越来越宅了,放学后就待在家上网,睡觉,连吃东西也打包还有想省钱的话,就以睡觉来忘记饥饿的感觉。。。
这个学期我有两个目标,第一就是考试要全过,第二就是找钱。第一个目标是为了让自己简单一点如果我真的需要Repeat,因为我没那个心情去Resit我去年的科目,也没那个能量去办到这件事,所以我不去想它,做好现在就好了。虽然是酱讲,但是自己也希望可以resit掉它,酱我可以跟我朋友们一起毕业,但是毕业后我又要做什么?>.< 又头痛了,如果我毕业不了,需要repeat,到时我还有一班可以嘻嘻哈哈,一起温习的朋友吗。。。可能到时的我少了很多的笑容,多了很多的负能量。无论如何,早毕业还是迟毕业,过后的时也让我头疼。。。我要做什么呢。。?
我的第二个目标就是找钱。没错!~找钱,现实一点比较好,至少不怕因为没钱而烦恼。。。但是我现在也会为钱烦恼,因为自己在开始没努力,结果借到一半的ptptn把了,虽然没什么大问题,因为也只剩一个学期的学费罢了,而且是少过一千,所以问题不大,只是我不好意识跟家人要学费的钱,因为本来可以不跟他们拿的,因为借到一半,所以没办法,对不起自己还有家人,如果我不想麻烦到家人,因为我来读书也用了不少钱,每个学他们给我五百块,有时会不够用,但是也不会跟他们要多,他们问我够用嘛,我一定会讲够就算不够,因为我不想他们辛苦,不想他们多花一点钱在我身上,有钱就收着就好,还是给弟弟或姐姐他们拉,我不想给他们压力,我想靠自己找钱,虽然都不很成功的找到工做,都是些event的工,而且有几次在没办法的情况下推掉本来预先要做的工,结果我的工作经验也少得很,也不很敢去问工,担心因为自己没经验而不请。。现在我星期五,星期六,还有星期日都得空,如果我没回家的话,那这三天我都待在电脑前做白痴,也会拿一点时间来做tutorial功课。我要省钱,但是有时因为想配合朋友,没办法才要出多些的钱。。。大家开心就好。。。也苦了自己,但是想想,自己并不苦,如果我跟家人拿钱,那他们就苦,所以我不很舍得用钱,除非我觉得朋友开心的话,那就无所谓啦,你们开心就好啦。。。
2.00好了,还有很多想写,但是也累了,脑袋不会动了,下次再写吧。。。
其实自己还有一个小小的愿望,就是如果2012真的世界末日,我希望我可以在那一刻陪在她身边,就算她身边有她的他,但是让我待在她身边就好了,至少我不怕面对世界末日,因为还有她在我身边。。。
讲到明就是我怕一个人,毕竟我知道待在她身边的不会是我,但是我还是希望。。。是因为我得不到她而不甘心还是我真的爱上一个见面很少,讲话也不多,相处的时间少之又少到没有真真的我与她的回忆,但是她可以让我感到痛。。。
2.14我。结束
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Monday, October 26, 2009
Friday, October 23, 2009
Thursday, October 15, 2009
If i cant graduate at the time with my friend....
then i will need to repeat for the fail subject....
mean i need study for maybe 1 more year or 2 more year in order to graduate...
what will i be at that time?
what will happen to me at that time?
alone?
single?
lonely?
new friend?
I never expect i can do a pass for my fail subject for last year (BS,QS,FOA,WPD)
2 of mine fail subjek had already not exist in the new batch ...
which mean i may need one on one to lecturer if i am the only person who fail for the subjek within my batch...
Just hope that i had the brave and motivation for next sem to take the fail subject to pass it and graduate together with my friend...
Just hope for it...
My goal for this sem is try my hard and the best to get all pass which can make me get GPA 2.0 for current sem.
Pray for it....
My second goal is try to earn some money and reduce to use lot of money on entertainment and unrelevant spending cost...I dunwant my family worry about my financial problem.
Life is reality; so i need to be reality...
then i will need to repeat for the fail subject....
mean i need study for maybe 1 more year or 2 more year in order to graduate...
what will i be at that time?
what will happen to me at that time?
alone?
single?
lonely?
new friend?
I never expect i can do a pass for my fail subject for last year (BS,QS,FOA,WPD)
2 of mine fail subjek had already not exist in the new batch ...
which mean i may need one on one to lecturer if i am the only person who fail for the subjek within my batch...
Just hope that i had the brave and motivation for next sem to take the fail subject to pass it and graduate together with my friend...
Just hope for it...
My goal for this sem is try my hard and the best to get all pass which can make me get GPA 2.0 for current sem.
Pray for it....
My second goal is try to earn some money and reduce to use lot of money on entertainment and unrelevant spending cost...I dunwant my family worry about my financial problem.
Life is reality; so i need to be reality...
Saturday, October 3, 2009
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